When I was in high school, I used to have a friend name Nina, Nina Deppe. Anyway, I'm not sure what happened to her, but recently she popped into my head, or rather a scene from a day we had once spent together did. I decided to write a poem about this scene. The poem is sort of a free verse kind of thing. Enjoy.
Nineteen years ago, we sat with each other near my bookcase in my room and spoke about whether God existed.
As proof of God, you offered this: "That feeling that you get when you do something nice for someone."
You were adamant that this feeling was a form of proof that God existed. You were so adamant, in fact, that you drew a line under your point with a rhetorical question: "If God doesn't exist, what's that feeling, then?"
I just laughed you under the table. I was 17 years old at the time and just laughed you under the table.
"Oh my god," I had said. "You think that that good feeling that you get after doing something nice for someone is proof that God exists? Are you kidding me? That's not proof God exists."
You just shook your head at me. My words seemed not to shake your belief about this feeling or your faith in general.
Nineteen years later, I'm writing to tell you, Nina, that I now understand what you were talking about.